Canada’s Super Spies “Discover” Cybercrime is a Threat

image Canada’s Security Intelligence Service, CSIS, (Canada’s spies), according to a just released, heavily censored “TOP SECRET” memo, (no, I’m not making this up), has ferreted out a startling fact on cybercrime – it’s growing!

I can appreciate why this startling discovery needed to be designated “top secret”. Panic in the streets, possible riots, a reverting to pre- Internet days, are all conceivable outcomes should the average Canadian become aware that CYBERCRIME IS GROWING!

Here’s a sampling of the content from this “top secret” memo – “Compromises of computer and combinations networks of the Government of Canada, Canadian universities, private companies and individual customer networks have increased substantially”.

These “top secret” spies didn’t stop with just recognizing this previously unknown threat to Canada’s safety and security. After all, these are highly trained spies who, you have to know, are the cream of the crop.

No, they went on to craft a well thought out, highly creative response to this newly identified cyber security threat, and focused on this advice – “the federal government needs to take urgent action or risk being targeted by hackers who use social media, such as Twitter, to steal secret government or corporate information.

Wow, this is startling news. Hackers using social media, including Twitter. Who knew!


The Canadian Government responded to this newly discovered threat in its usual forthright and non-compromising manner, by assuring Canadians “they are working to develop a framework to deal with cyber-attacks”.

When I read this statement, I was overcome with a huge sense of relief. I felt like standing up and shouting “hurrah”. Yes!

Not only has my government put its best and brightest to work identifying this previously unknown threat, but it’s prepared to take action – at some point. I must admit, I was impressed with this.

What more can a citizen expect than to have a government which is, “working to develop a framework to deal with cyber-attacks”.

Now, if you’re a Canadian, I’m sure you must feel safer knowing that your government, assigned its “James Bond” department which used the latest high tech and secret tools (to secret to disclose here), to hammer down what had previously been just a rumor, that CYBERCRIME IS GROWING!

If you’re elsewhere in the World, and you have even a modicum of knowledge of the current Internet environment, and the enormous threat to your personal safety and security cybercrime represents, and has represented for some considerable time, you can now sit back and LYAO.

How clueless, and  inept, is a government which classifies as “TOP SECRET”, what is common knowledge held by anyone who can click a mouse button. If you’re a Canadian, then at the next election consider throwing these bums out.

Only in Canada, eh!

If you found this article useful, why not subscribe to this Blog via RSS, or email? It’s easy; just click on this link and you’ll never miss another Tech Thoughts article.


Filed under Bill's Rants, cybercrime, Interconnectivity, Personal Perspective, social networking, Tech Net News, Windows Tips and Tools

28 responses to “Canada’s Super Spies “Discover” Cybercrime is a Threat

  1. Owel


    Funny when you read this article and then at the end something like “If you found this article useful,….”. Good article but the pun is a little harsh.


    • Bill Mullins

      Hi Owel,

      This site specializes in both system and Internet security issues, as do I, in “real” life. It’s abhorrent to me that any government/country, would consider the present state of Internet security to be a secret. Or, continue to be lackadaisical in implementing a robust plan to address this issue. This is not some minor crime, or safety issue; this is an industry of crime taken to new levels continuously.

      The intent of this article is to point out in a satirical manner, an issue that is relevant to all Internet users. Surely that makes this article “useful”.


  2. Mick

    Can you please provide a link to the whole article or memo? Seems to me that your just another American who has issues with Canada, just because it’s Canada. So the Canadian government is announcing that cybercrime is growing in Canada. So what? if that’s a fact than why laughing that they announce it? Very childish written post, you just want to have a reason to laugh about Canadians, like almost every American. For what reason? i don’t know but it seems to me that it has to do with insecurity. Mick from Holland

    • Bill Mullins


      In the first place, I’m a Canadian living in Toronto. The article clearly states “Not only has MY government ….” In the second place, I am an IT professional who specializes in system and Internet security related issues.

      Given the current state of Internet security, as it affects average users, the Canadian goverment releasing a heavily censored TOP SECRET memo, describing cyber crime as a growing threat, is not only laughable; its sad. Particularly when one is aware, that an educated Internet user is constantly reminded of safety issues which need to be considered when surfing the Internet.

      This article is not about Canadians, but instead, it’s about a Canadian government that is stuck in a time warp. As a Canadian, I have no hesitation in making this observation.


      The rest of your comment –

  3. Mick


    I’m sorry for my harsh reaction. I just got a little bit up set, since living in America brought, in my experience, a lot of unreasonable skeptical opinions towards Canadians. I therefore apologize for misunderstanding the purpose of your post. And I will certainly continue following your posts in the future.


    • Bill Mullins


      No, no, I understand. Most of my relatives are American and I’ve had the odd set to, over some of the issues you pointed out.

      I just wanted you to know – as Labatt’s is so fond of saying – I AM Canadian.


  4. Mister Reiner

    In my opinion, hacking is and isn’t the government’s problem. On one hand, you have individual organizations, businesses and citizens that are unable to properly secure their computing assets from compromise and theft of information – and from a big picture perspective, one might perceive this to be a government problem. On the other hand, you have to ask yourself, why does the government have to step in to deal with a nationwide problem like this? It’s like saying the government needs to take over securing buildings and homes because thieves can break into them.

    The lack of a secure computing environment is a people problem, not a government problem. Why? Because (1) those that develop the technology don’t know how to make it more secure [ more security software is not the answer ] and (2) people don’t know how to properly secure their assets and protect their information. Yes, hackers and vulnerabilities are a contributing factor, but hackers are not the only ones responsible for the hacking problem.

    Your government is no worse than the U.S. government. The U.S. government didn’t really have a plan until recently either.

    • Bill Mullins

      Hey Mister Reiner,

      Yes, your points are definitely worth considering, and each one has a relative truth attached. But many, I think, can be countered by one overiding reality – we live in a nanny state.

      Virtually every consumer product/service is subject to legislation designed to protect consumers from themselves. Computers are seen by users as essentially no different than any other appliance – just like a TV, or a Stove, or a Washing Machine. We don’t expect an appliance to harm us in any way, no matter how stupid we behave. Most consumers have now come to expect the same degree of harmlessness from their computers, albeit in a non physical sense.

      The recent Bank bailout , while not directly related, certainly continued to set the tone of “save me, save me.”

      Thanks for dropping by.


  5. Owel

    Hi Bill,

    Oh yes the site is very useful. In fact I love it! Been reading for a while now and have picked so may useful tips and resources.

    I just thought I should post in regards to this article alone. I can see the funny and serious side of it but at the end I wondered what was the real purpose of the article.


    • Bill Mullins

      Hi Owel,

      Yes, I recognized you as a regular reader. And as a regular reader, you’ll know that I cajole, bring down doom and gloom, but most of all, use an educational approach in an attempt to get readers to understand that Internet security is a very serious issue. One that requires knowledge, consistency of behaviour, and the installation of the proper tools.

      This morning, when I read of this memo, it struck me immediately just how far behind the reality of the terrible conditions on the Internet the Canadian government really is. I should point out, this state of affairs is typical of many governments.

      I decided, in the circumstances, to point a scathing finger at my own government (satirically), in the hope that readers might draw similar conclusions vis a vis their own governments.


  6. Owel

    Hi Bill,

    Ah point taken.


  7. Bill,
    Surperb article! Your satirical approach to a very serious issue was welcomed. Being in the IT business for many years, I’ve acquired a bit of cynicism myself and I have a couple of observations…that are not meant as a vicious attack upon Canada, but just observations that would fit any government. First, when any organization says they’re developing a “framework” it means they’ve been caught with their pants down and don’t have a clue yet on how to react. Second, when any organization…not just Canada, mind you…makes something “top secret” it usually means they’ve taken a hit by the cyber-crooks and it’s bad enough that they don’t want the details public. Call me cynical, but that’s how I see it.
    Keep up the excellent work you do.

    • Bill Mullins

      Hey Paul,

      OK, you’re cynical – but your dead on the money. lol It appears as if cynicism has real value after all.

      You raised a series of points that I actually hadn’t considered – looks like I’m going to have to ratchet up my own cynicism, a wee bit.

      “First, when any organization says they’re developing a “framework” it means they’ve been caught with their pants down and don’t have a clue yet on how to react.” This is a sensible conclusion, and I must agree with you.

      “Second, when any organization……makes something “top secret” it usually means they’ve taken a hit by the cyber-crooks and it’s bad enough that they don’t want the details public.” Again, something I hadn’t considered, but a perspective I quite agree with, in retrospect.

      Thank you for your insightful and thoughtful comment.



  8. Mal

    Hey Bill,

    An issue close to my heart, living here in Australia. I can relate to your comment about living in a nanny state, it won’t be long before I will need to read an instruction sheet on what I can and can’t do when I get up in the morning.

    As you know, Australia is proposing filtering content at ISP level, to “protect our children”. Good motive, but we all know it won’t work. They have even come out recently and said it WON’T be illegal to bypass the filters, so what’s the point of spending millions and millions on having it implemented. Seems to me that they could put these resources into tackling the scum that have made the internet such a dangerous place, for the unwary.

    My five bobs worth lol


    • Bill Mullins

      Hey Mal,

      I’ve been following the Australian proposal with great interest and you’re right, the money could be much better spent if it addressed the real problem, as you suggest.

      BTW, I hear your government has selected you, as a test subject for their new instruction scheme – “The Proper Way to Exit One’s Bed in the Morning” Good luck with that! lol



  9. dar

    -well said,Prof Bill
    [no doubt this piece of ‘news’ was released with President Harper’s permission]
    -here’s another example of ignoring the obvious:


    • Bill Mullins

      Thanks Dar,

      I think you’re right, President Harper has his hand in this somewhere. Not that that would be unusual in any way for Mr. MAXIMUM CONTROL.

      I appreciate the link.



  10. Liam O'Moulain

    Like you Bill, I’m a Canadian and I totally agree with you.

    Where do these people live – on another planet? How is it NOT possible to know how dangerous the Internet is, and has been for years.

    On the other hand, this is the government and I don’t expect anything better than this nonsense.

    Great article as usual.


    • Bill Mullins

      Hey Liam,

      Well, the government has certainly met your expectations with this ludicrous memo.

      Talk about massaging non-news for political advantage! Makes me want to run for KING. 🙂

      Thanks for stopping by.


  11. kingpin

    Hi Bill,
    Interesting Post!Good for Canada,I now wonder when will all the world’s government would take notice of Cybercrime very seriously.Even though it’s a old hypothesis,how about using the same or even better private programs against Cybercriminals themselves maybe then they will feel the heat,you know like fighting fire with fire.
    Thanks and have a nice day. 🙂

  12. Pingback: Is It Time To Say Goodbye To Windows XP? « Tech – for Everyone

  13. mark

    Nice post Bill, I think they deserve the George W. Bush excellence in government award for their asstute observations.
    Sad, the people who need to get this stuff before anyone seems to always be the last ones to figure it out.

    • Bill Mullins

      Hi Mark,

      I’ll be only too happy to hand “the George W. Bush excellence in government award” to those clowns. What a bunch of incompetents!

      To make matters worst, I had to listen to news stories, in which this moronic group was congratulated, time after time, by the usual talking head “security experts” who wouldn’t know a bot from a butt.

      Good to hear from you.


  14. Adrian

    When will Asian countries’ governments finally realize this threat and it is their country who are sheltering these cyber-criminals?


  15. Pingback: Is it safe to buy on ebay?

  16. Pingback: Does a Blogger’s Opinion Really Matter? « Bill Mullins' Weblog – Tech Thoughts